Where's November?

It feels like December. The mornings are chilly and foggy. Christmas decorations adorn lampposts and storefronts. Grocery stores have peppermint goodies stocked on shelves and a certain coffee chain is already using red cups and snowflake sleeves. When I walked by one of its many locations this morning, it was difficult to resist the temptation to go inside and order a cranberry bliss bar. I might not be so strong this afternoon.

If merchants and corporations are so eager for it to be December, I think The Powers That Be (TPTB) should eliminate November for a year, just to see how it goes.

• Coders at computer and software companies would have to work overtime to distribute patches for the change.
• Wristwatches with calendar features would need to be adjusted.
• The general public would have to get used to the idea that 11/9/07 was really December 9, 2007.
• Holiday listings would have to be revised (Veteran's Day - December 11, Thanksgiving - December 22, Christmas - December 55 (which could throw Santa for a loop), and New Year's Eve - December 61).
• People would also have to relearn Thirty Days Hath September.
• One's electric bill in December might look extra nasty, especially if one is a Christmas light fiend (as are so many of my neighbors).
• People who were November babies would suddenly be December babies, which might not sit so well with those who were born in the original month of December.

Of course, removing November could have a few positive repercussions, too...

• One would have one less house payment or month of rent to pay a year.
• Wall calendar publishers would only need to choose eleven photos, eliminating the need to pick that twelfth photo, which always seems to be a dud (and usually ends up in your birth month).
• Advent calendars would have 54 pieces of candy, instead of the typical 24.
• For television, November sweeps would become December sweeps and it would be twice as long. Imagine eight whole weeks where show producers and writers make a real effort to produce quality entertainment (or, at the very least, mildly amusing publicity stunts).
• And most importantly, NaNoWriMo participants would have 61 days to crank out their masterpieces. (820 words per day sounds doable!)

Despite that last upside, I'm glad nobody from TPTB has taken steps to eliminate November (that I'm aware of). The month might be gone in spirit, but not in name. Perhaps there will be a day when Thanksgiving and autumn will reassert themselves and take back the month that Christmas stole.