Day Grading
I'm not a fan of people asking, "How was your day?" It seems like an innocent question, but in truth, it's a devious question that demands an ambiguous, if not dishonest answer at best. When people ask it, they don't want to hear...
George: How was your day?
Me: Bad. I -
George: (looking at his watch) Would you look at the time? I'm late for the bus I need to jump in front of.
And they really don't want to hear...
George: How was your day?
Me: It was the worst day of my life. Do you have a few hours? I need you to relive it with me, blow by bloody blow. It began this morning when I mistook the cat food for cereal...
What they want is for you to distill your day down to a word and round it up to the nearest positive term...
George: How was your day?
Me: (looking an inch away from death) Splenderrific.
George: Excellent!
Wouldn't it be nice if there was a way to answer the question clearly, concisely, and honestly? Now there is, with a system I like to call Day Grading. It's complicated to explain, so I'll use an example instead. Let's look at yesterday...
| Explanation | Points |
|---|---|
| A new day begins | +100 |
| Strange overcast and muggy weather | -5 |
| Have to go to work | -5 |
| Remember I'm getting paid | +4 |
| See people in line for the Harry Potter movie, anticipate watching it tomorrow | +5 |
| Finish reading my 25th book of the year | +3 |
| See part of the All-Star game, Nationals lose yet again (-10), but Ichiro hits an in-the-park home run (+3) | -7 |
| Strange weather becomes even stranger with rain and thunder | -5 |
| See promo for The Singing Bee, a new game show where people sing lyrics for money, looks dumb and humiliating (-5), hosted by Joey Fatone of 'N Sync fame (-2) | -7 |
| Watch news about an evasive White House (-5), Iraq (-3), Lebanon/Palestine (-3), and a balloon-flying man in Oregon (+1) | -10 |
| Total | 73 |
See, I add or subtract points in my head as the day progresses, depending on my experiences and observations, so when George asks the inevitable question, I have an answer ready...
George: How was your day?
Me: Oh, C-.
George: Ouch. I'm having a C+ kind of day myself. I would have been at a B- if it hadn't been for those insidious Singing Bee commercials.
Me: I know what you mean. What a downer.
The next time somebody asks you how your day was, give Day Grading a try. If he or she gives you a befuddled look, don't forget to add 2 points to your total. It might just be the boost you need to take it from an A to an A+ day.
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birdwalking2 Comments
love the day grading system. if we all really answered the question honestly then life would be one big gripefest from every body answering honestly. Good idea!!
Thanks! Anything to keep the griping to a minimum (mine included). :P