Outside is clear and sunny. At least it is as long as I look out the left side of the train. If I look out the right side, it's just drab and foggy. I can barely make out the cars driving along the road running parallel with the tracks. Most of them don't have their headlights on. They look like dark fish swimming through murky water.

Yesterday, I took mass transit home. The light rail was standing room only, so I stood. Standing on the train is fine. I like standing. Not to brag, but I'm good at it. Balancing on two feet without the help of hands or handles or one's rear end requires some talent. Not a lot. Just some.

It had been a long day and I was tired. Whenever I'm tired, my sarcastic side tends to come out. Little things that typically wouldn't faze me have a way of becoming the most annoying things in the world. Last night, to prevent that from happening, I started reading a book. That's when I heard a voice. It was a loud and happy voice belonging to a woman sitting nearby. She had been talking on her cell phone from the moment I boarded, but I only noticed her then.

As I said, she was loud. She was so loud, I was sure that people outside the train could hear her (Doppler effect and all). I tried to ignore her and succeeded for the most part, but if the tone of her voice could talk, it would have said something like, "Hi! I'm loud and happy! I bet nobody else on the train can hear me! I should speak up and use more exclamation!"

The conversation soon came to a grateful end. There was peace and quiet. My sarcastic side hoped she had used the last of her daily allotment of oxygen and words, but she hadn’t. The peace and quiet lasted fifteen seconds, the amount of time it took her to dial another number. This time, I couldn't help but overhear everything she said. Her side of the conversation went something like this:

"Hi you! I'm on the light rail heading home! I know! The light rail! Heading home! So I'll see you in a minute! I've had such a busy day! I know! I had to go to Natalie's birthday party! Oh, I haven't told anybody this yet! You're going to be the first to know since I have you on the phone! Guess what Bill got her! Guess! An engagement ring! Ooh! He proposed! Can you believe it? I know! It was so sweet! My best friend is getting married! I was going to tell you when I saw you, but I couldn't wait! You're the first to know! And guess what! I'm going to be the maid of honor! I know! Oh, this is my stop! Huh? Do I see you? Wait! No! Wait! Yes! Talk to you in a sec! Bye!"

With that, she closed her phone and stepped off the train. The doors shut and the light rail was silent once more. My sarcastic side half-expected to hear coins drop. I hadn’t taken mass transit home, I had taken the mobile phone booth.