Some days the world seems so big, while my world seems so small. All I can see are these four walls and at this moment, it's the extent of my universe.

Outside could be a forest of trees or a busy city street. The sun could be shining or it could be black as night. The nearest person could be a thousand miles away or just outside my window. It makes no difference.

From where I'm sitting, I'm the only person here. I'm the only one I see. For all I know, I'm the only one thinking of me, the only one aware of my existence. I'm alone and feeling a tinge of loneliness. I'd reach out to somebody now, but to have a conversation would take too much effort and be such an imposition. I would be awful company, a terrible anti-depressant.

So I prefer this solitude, a moment with my thoughts, a chance to understand where I am. It's a moment for self-evaluation, to see if I'm any happier than I was six months ago, when I first began writing, when I embarked on this seemingly different path.

Have I lost my focus or strayed from my purpose? Am I any closer to being unafraid? Am I any less broken? Would I be having these thoughts if I was in love?

I wonder if I will be thinking these same things six months from now. Will I find the strength to overcome myself or rediscover myself? Will I have taken the right steps, steps that has eluded me for so long?

While I'm well aware that there are big and important things going on in the world, this is what occupies my mind right now. My world is within these walls, my universe within these thoughts.